The Ancient Gesture of the Holy Kiss Hidden in Today’s Mass

The Ancient Gesture of the Holy Kiss Hidden in Today’s Mass

Long time ago at church, at the time the priest said, “Offer one another the sign of peace,” I actually saw some man kiss another man on the cheek, a child on the forehead, and a lady on the hand. I’m assuming they were not related. Recently, I read how this trend continues, as a blogger wrote about a similar situation.

That memory stayed with me, not because it was unusual, but because it felt ancient — like I had accidentally witnessed something older than the parish itself. At the time, I didn’t fully understand what I was seeing. It looked like a simple gesture of goodwill, maybe even a cultural flourish. Only later did I realize I had seen a living remnant of a tradition that reaches back to the world of Jesus and even before.

In the ancient Mediterranean world, a kiss was not romantic but relational. It was a sign of respect, kinship, and peace. Men greeted men with a kiss on the cheek. Children were kissed on the forehead as a blessing. Women, especially those outside one’s family, were greeted with a kiss on the hand as a mark of honor. These gestures were woven into daily life — as normal then as a handshake or nod is today. When Jesus walked the earth, this was the world He inhabited. He even references the greeting kiss when He tells a Pharisee, “You gave me no kiss,” showing that the gesture was expected hospitality. Judas’s betrayal is shocking precisely because he uses the kiss — a symbol of loyalty — to identify his Master.

But something remarkable happened after the Resurrection. The apostles took this ordinary cultural greeting and elevated it into something sacred. What had been a sign of friendship became a sign of Christian unity. What had been a gesture of respect became a gesture of reconciliation. Paul and Peter both command the early believers to “greet one another with a holy kiss,” not as a social nicety but as a visible expression of the peace Christ gives.

Very early on, this “holy kiss” found its place in the liturgy. By the second century, Christians were already exchanging it after the Lord’s Prayer and before Communion — the same place where the Sign of Peace remains today. It was the moment when believers made peace with one another before approaching the altar. Men kissed men, women kissed women, and the gesture moved through the assembly like a wave of reconciliation.

Over time, cultures shifted. The kiss faded in some places and remained in others. In the West, it eventually softened into a handshake, a bow, a nod, or even a simple wave across the church. But the meaning stayed the same: peace, unity, and the recognition that we approach the Eucharist not as isolated individuals but as one Body.

So when I think back to that moment — the man kissing another man on the cheek, the child receiving a kiss on the forehead, the lady offered a respectful kiss on the hand — I see it differently now. It wasn’t odd. It wasn’t out of place. It was a glimpse into the deep roots of Christian worship, a living echo of the world Jesus knew and the Church He founded.

And when I read that blogger describing the same thing happening today, I realized something beautiful: traditions don’t survive because they are enforced. They survive because they still speak. They still carry meaning. They still connect us to something larger than ourselves.

The holy kiss may look different now — a handshake, a bow, a wave across the nave — but the heart of it remains unchanged. It is the peace of Christ, passed from one believer to another, just as it has been for two thousand years.